Jekyll and Hyde

Well, I have a busy day tomorrow but I can't seem to sleep early as I had planned =..=

Maybe I have too much on my mind.
What do I have on my mind?

I have no idea either. ._.

"Let's just make this post to keep the blog going."
That's one.

Well, ever had anything you kept very dearly and hold on to it for so long you almost forget but can't?
I had one. It was a poem I made for someone I used to be with. I can't remember much of it anymore. But sometimes, you just got to let go of things you love and move on. Even if it's a hurtful long journey.
I lost that poem somehow. If I still had it I would have posted it.
Unlucky for you readers. :P

Hmmm...
What else do I think of?
Sometimes I just don't know it myself. I tire myself thinking about stuffs but I myself don't even know what is it about. It's like I have another person doing it for me inside my head.

I guess that goes back to when I was a kid. I used to imagine of a person like a mirror of me to talk to about stuffs. I think all you guys would say it's an imaginary friend. But it's more like another personality of mine; like Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde.

Something like that...

I do it still sometimes, but not much now. Once in awhile. You may call me weird or more stuff you can think of. But it was, is the only place I can find my center of peace.
My nice side isn't always a nice side. It's always filled with death, anger, fury inside. But that side isn't completely with me...
How do I say it, it's like another person. A person that is inside of me. An alternate ego? Whatever you call it.

Sometimes, I talk to this person inside my head imagining that person would sometimes give me a beating for stuffs I do and stuffs I didn't do. But most of the time the talks goes pretty deep and I guess he's more calm and more wise. Resolves all the problems I have.

._.
This is one of the reasons why I am such an anti-social person. Also one of the reasons why I would be bipolar.

All in all, I have not seen this guy for almost a year. It's too dangerous to let that side out of me. It has the anger, grudge and fury of a serial killer. I guess with him gone, my anger management went much better.


But in the end, he will be leashed and go on rampage when someone breaks the seal (this side of me).




Okay... I think that's all for tonight's post. Before you guys start getting weird out by me. :D
I have thought of meeting a psychologist, but then.... Naaaah...
Things are the way there are because they are.
Some things you just have to let it be. A mind of a person is not something to explore. It is to understand.